Hello from California where the entire sky is the wrong color, gathering indoors is prohibited, breathing outdoors is toxic and everyone is acting like things are normal. Sure, we post pictures of the apocalyptic scenery; but then we go back to our zoom meetings and watching our kids do PE online while wearing muted headphones.
Can we please normalize admitting the fact that nothing about this is normal?
I’m not saying we need to wallow. In fact, I’ve been trying to live in a place of positivity thanks to Amy’s advice to “take dope, have hope, whatever.” Yet, at this point, at least today, I need to remind myself that it’s okay to not be okay.
Nothing about this is normal.
It’s not normal that my kid’s socially distanced outdoor with masks Girl Scout meetings get cancelled because the air is unhealthy.
It’s not normal to smize like a Tyra Banks protégé so the grocery store clerk knows you’re appreciative.
It’s definitely not normal to spend this much time indoors with my spouse, two dogs, and three children.
I’m losing my mind.
And that’s okay.
It’s okay to agree with my kids that, yes, this sucks. It all sucks. Everything sucks. It’s okay that I don’t have the capacity to be Mary Poppins during every second of distance learning. It’s okay to be sad about never seeing our friends. It’s okay if our co-workers hear barking and crying in the background from time to time because, we’re working from home during a pandemic and climate emergency.
It’s okay to admit that this is hard; even while simultaneously knowing to our bones that we can do hard things.
Just because we can survive it, doesn’t mean we need to pretend that everything is normal.
So, I don’t know about all of you, but I’m going to let myself feel all of the feelings. My kids will get mental health days even though school is in their house. We are going to eat junk sometimes. Fine, a lot. Everyone will get way too much screen time. I’ll work out when I want or I won’t. I’ll probably never wear real clothes again. And I won’t feel bad about it anymore.
I’m going to normalize admitting that nothing is normal.
Heidi is currently obsessed with watching people make bad decisions on TV, being a coastal elite, artificially avoiding any sign of aging, reading feminist romance novels, and getting the biggest laugh at her own expense. She has a husband, 3 kids, a dog and anxiety.